So. Ahem.

So. I didn't realize anybody would ever actually read my "blog." So. Now that two people have found it, I feel like I have to write. Maybe that's a good thing.

Well, apparently I was a leeeettle hard on myself back in FEBRUARY when I wrote my first post. I do that sometimes. Sorry. I don't really hate myself! In fact, I'm happier now than I have been in ages.

I guess I'll start with my first bulleted item. Because I'm into order, people. And because those little girls are easy to write about.

Rhiannon started third grade this year. She's at a new school. She is the most difficult person I have ever known! But she's just like me! And I love her SO MUCH. One of my favorite writers talked once about how the things your child has in common with you often are the things that drive you the most crazy. Because you don't want them to be like you in this way. But that girl is so precious to me, too. She will read and read and read, and sigh and say, "This book is so good." And I really know what she means. She's also an incredibly smart person. There's no telling what she'll do in her life.

Now, Bella is just a little ray of sunshine. Her personality is most assuredly like Brandon's. Bella started kindergarten this year. I was struck by how young she seems. I don't remember Rhiannon being such a baby when she started school! The first few days when I picked Bella up in the carpool line after school, I was just overcome with emotion when I would see her out there in the sea of children, so small and unsure of what to do. But once she's in the car with us, she shakes it off and is perfectly happy. Me and Rhiannon would be cranky for hours after such an ordeal!

So maybe there will be a third child to talk about someday. Sometimes I feel sure there will be, and others I really don't believe it will ever happen. It's weird. I've always felt like I was not exactly as "Christian" as I should be. I mean, I try, but nothing ever really happens. I try to understand that my experience doesn't have to be like everybody else's for it to be real, you know? Anyway, that was just a disclaimer for what I'm about to write: I believe God will give us a baby if He has one for us. I honestly, truly believe that. And most of the time I'm content with it. Other times, not so much. Then, I think about how not everybody who adopts a baby believes in God, so how did they get their baby? My problem, I'm pretty sure, is that I'm too much of a realist. If I think too much about things, which I always do, I have a hard time believing anything.

Um, one of Shelley's nicknames for me is "Princess of Darkness." Somehow it fits, doesn't it? :o)

We're going to keep all of Shelley's chil'ren tonight. So she and Shea can have a break. I may have to be committed afterward, but hey! Ha. Just kidding. It will be fun. I CAN'T WAIT to get my baby Larson! He's the most precious baby EVER, I'm pretty sure.

All righty then. Maybe I'll write again in another six months or so. Thanks for reading, y'all!

xo